Thriving Through the Journey: Raine Anderson’s Dyslexia Story | Dont Call On Me, The Dyslexia Podcast Ep. 10

[00:00:00] The biggest thing for me is build your own support system and have people around you that you can ask questions to, that you trust. Keep having the hard conversations with school. I know some of them are really, really tough. And it's very emotional. Every time I talk about it, think about it, I get emotions and keep having the hard conversations.

[00:00:26] This is Megan, owner of Dyslexia On Demand.

[00:00:30] And I'm Erin, owner of Advocate to Educate.

[00:00:34] And we are the Dont Call On Me Podcast.

[00:00:37] We are here to talk about dyslexia, to remove the stigma, to hear what families really go through, and to share their stories.

[00:00:45] In both of our businesses and personal experiences on a daily basis, we listen to people telling their stories.

[00:00:53] Many of heartbreak, many of struggle, but most all have a silver lining. Even eventually.

[00:01:01] It's all about the stories. The more we share, the more we realize we aren't alone and we are a community.

[00:01:08] Know, a tribe standing together.

[00:01:15] Today's episode is sponsored by Dyslexia On Demand.

[00:01:18] Dyslexia On Demand uses only the highest trained dyslexia therapists, and it's all one-on-one and individualized to your child's needs.

[00:01:28] The best part is that it doesn't matter where you're located because it's all virtual.

[00:01:33] Visit us at dyslexiaondemand.com to learn more.

[00:01:38] Today's episode is sponsored by Advocate to Educate.

[00:01:41] We help parents navigate through the confusing maze of special education in public schools in California.

[00:01:48] We support families starting as early as preschool through 12th grade, creating individual education plans to support the specific needs of your unique and amazing child.

[00:02:00] To learn more, go to our website, advocate2educate.com.

[00:02:07] Today we are interviewing two folks that I have actually known for quite a long time.

[00:02:14] So we have Rain Anderson and Shannon Anderson.

[00:02:19] And I've known Rain back, gosh, since you were in second?

[00:02:26] First grade?

[00:02:27] First grade, yeah.

[00:02:28] Oh my gosh, it's been forever.

[00:02:30] Whatever.

[00:02:30] And just found out that it is Rain's birthday today.

[00:02:34] And she is so sweet to take her time to tell us her story today on such an important day.

[00:02:41] But Rain and Shannon both are going to be sharing the dyslexia story, the journey that has been Rain.

[00:02:51] And I was just saying a second ago, before we started recording about how this is really both journeys, right?

[00:02:59] So it is Rain's journey, but it was also Shannon's journey before Rain, I think, even had the realization of what was going on.

[00:03:08] It's mom fighting that battle.

[00:03:09] So today we're hearing from both of them to just really kind of encapsulate and share your story for the world so that everybody can recognize that they're not alone.

[00:03:22] That's kind of our whole point here.

[00:03:23] So we kind of want a little bit of background, like in terms of, and I bet you part of this is going to be a little bit of Shannon starting, but, you know, when you learned you had dyslexia, and that's honestly probably a question for both of you guys.

[00:03:38] But, you know, just kind of, what did that look like?

[00:03:42] We'll just kind of start there.

[00:03:44] And, and as, as somebody with dyslexia, also, I would love if Rain could answer this question to start because I have, I have this moment in my head of my own journey.

[00:03:58] And so I'm curious if you also have this in your head of the moment you thought something may be different about the way you're learning about your, about school in general, or kind of how it showed up for you.

[00:04:16] If it was mom saying something or you noticing something, but really for you, what was that, that first moment where you go, okay, is this something?

[00:04:27] What's going on?

[00:04:28] I mean, actually you could both answer that, that question, honestly.

[00:04:32] Well, I was really young when I first learned that I had dyslexia.

[00:04:37] So honestly, it's like all kind of like a blur a little bit, but I just remember being like embarrassed.

[00:04:45] Like it was embarrassing for me.

[00:04:48] Like people know that I had dyslexia.

[00:04:51] Yeah.

[00:04:52] When I was in second grade, I failed a spelling test or something.

[00:04:56] And I called my dad and from, from the actual school office and I was sobbing on the phone and I was like, you have to come to school.

[00:05:05] He came to school.

[00:05:07] And I remember sitting with him and just saying, I'm so dumb.

[00:05:10] I am so dumb.

[00:05:11] Everybody else, you know, did fine on this test.

[00:05:14] And I studied and I failed.

[00:05:16] And like, it was the moment where I recognized like how, how embarrassing it is to be different than what I thought my peers were going through.

[00:05:27] Right.

[00:05:27] Like I, I just felt so alone.

[00:05:30] So I have to ask you really quickly, because you were diagnosed so young, you were somebody who was like super fortunate to be able to, mom was on it, school was on it.

[00:05:43] You know, that's usually not the case.

[00:05:45] But when do you remember, was it like first grade, second grade, where you felt like that, where you felt a difference?

[00:05:53] It was really like in first grade.

[00:05:56] First grade.

[00:05:57] I started getting bullied a lot.

[00:06:00] Like that was when I was like, finally realized what dyslexia was.

[00:06:04] Yeah.

[00:06:05] I didn't understand it really.

[00:06:08] But like once I started being bullied, actually, like I finally like had a like realization.

[00:06:15] She was so much further behind than the other kids in first grade as far as just like meeting standards and reading and everything.

[00:06:21] They were all taking off at first grade and she wasn't.

[00:06:25] So it was very noticeable.

[00:06:28] And at that time, at that point, we didn't, we didn't have a formal diagnosis yet.

[00:06:34] It wasn't until the summer before second grade that we had a formal diagnosis.

[00:06:39] Yeah.

[00:06:41] But we, I mean, I noticed as early as probably four years old when they started doing like writing her name and her dad, my husband, her dad is dyslexic.

[00:06:51] So we kind of had an inkling that maybe something was going on.

[00:06:56] Yeah.

[00:06:57] But it probably as early as four.

[00:06:59] We had preschool teachers telling us, eh, something's going on.

[00:07:03] We're not quite sure what it is.

[00:07:05] Yeah.

[00:07:05] All right.

[00:07:06] And so then what led you guys to the diagnosis?

[00:07:11] How did, what was the channel that you went through?

[00:07:14] We met another mom and she was dyslexic herself.

[00:07:18] Her son ended up being dyslexic.

[00:07:20] Dyslexic.

[00:07:20] And in like first grade, she had told us about Scottish Rite.

[00:07:26] And so back then, and it come a long way, you know, school wasn't testing.

[00:07:32] They weren't, they were like, oh, wait till she's this age.

[00:07:34] Wait till this, she's that age.

[00:07:36] And we pushed and we pushed and we were getting nowhere.

[00:07:39] So we put her on the list and she ended up getting in because it's, it's free testing.

[00:07:45] And it's a wait list situation.

[00:07:47] And it was, I mean, thank goodness.

[00:07:49] It was an amazing experience.

[00:07:50] And I'm so glad that we found that and we were able to do it early because who knows when

[00:07:56] they would have actually done it at school.

[00:07:59] Yeah, totally.

[00:08:00] When you're able to get diagnosed that early.

[00:08:03] And like, so Rain is saying that she like was feeling that social emotional, like, like

[00:08:09] impact, right.

[00:08:11] That early on.

[00:08:12] And I find, especially with girls, you guys are just like that much more hyper aware of

[00:08:18] the situation.

[00:08:19] But when we can turn the ship around, because we have an identification that early, a lot

[00:08:25] of times I'm just kind of like, there's a point if, if the child does undergo therapy

[00:08:30] that you get to a point where it's like, they're none the wiser.

[00:08:33] Like it's before all that bullying starts.

[00:08:36] It's before that social emotional impact.

[00:08:39] Um, you know, where it's not like if you were diagnosed in middle school and then had already

[00:08:46] endured that for so many years.

[00:08:48] So I wanted to go back to actually rain when you talked about being bullied, if you would

[00:08:53] be so kind to share what, what happened and, and what you experienced.

[00:08:58] Cause I think other kids need to know that they're not the only ones being, being bullied.

[00:09:04] Well, I have this one memory and I was at lunch.

[00:09:08] I remember I was sitting there and I was asking my, like my friend group, like, why aren't

[00:09:14] y'all like friends with me?

[00:09:15] Like, why aren't y'all like hanging out with me?

[00:09:17] And they all just like said like, well, you don't try hard enough in school.

[00:09:22] Oh my gosh.

[00:09:23] And I actually like, I remember that too.

[00:09:26] And I was really, really young.

[00:09:28] I still remember that today.

[00:09:29] And I remember everything that happened.

[00:09:31] And they were just sitting there telling me that I was like not smart enough and that

[00:09:35] I act like I just like, didn't try in school.

[00:09:39] Wow.

[00:09:40] Mom, did she tell you that when that happened?

[00:09:43] Yeah, she did tell me that when it happened.

[00:09:46] Um, and you know, she experienced a lot of that.

[00:09:49] I mean, all the way through elementary school, honestly, even with, even with the diagnosis,

[00:09:54] I mean, she wasn't able to explain or vocalize after she knew what was going on.

[00:10:01] But at times, you know, if you're reading aloud in class, it doesn't make a difference.

[00:10:06] I mean, you're still, or if you're getting pulled out of class all the time, everybody

[00:10:10] asks you, why are you going?

[00:10:11] Where are you?

[00:10:12] Why are you?

[00:10:12] Why are you always gone?

[00:10:14] And, um, so there's constant questioning as to what, what's wrong with you.

[00:10:19] Yeah.

[00:10:20] Yeah.

[00:10:21] As a kid, man, it's those, those little things that just imprint so deep and your brain just,

[00:10:30] it just constantly goes back to that question of that's how we get to the what's wrong with

[00:10:35] me.

[00:10:36] Right.

[00:10:36] Why am I a hundred percent?

[00:10:38] Yeah.

[00:10:38] And you carry that, you can carry that into adulthood.

[00:10:41] I mean, well, that's what I was going to ask.

[00:10:44] I was going to ask Ray.

[00:10:45] And like, I always talk to my six-year-old about that little voice in his head that no

[00:10:49] one else can hear, but that he can hear.

[00:10:51] And I feel like a lot of dyslexics really understand that in the sense that like, it's

[00:10:57] the voice that tells us how dumb we are.

[00:10:59] It's the voice that tells us, uh, that, you know what, maybe my friends are right.

[00:11:04] Maybe I'm not trying hard enough.

[00:11:06] Right.

[00:11:07] Like, what does that even mean?

[00:11:08] Because, you know, we know those of us that have had some sort of treatment know we are

[00:11:13] trying hard.

[00:11:15] And I'm wondering now at the new age of 14, if that voice creeps back up for you.

[00:11:22] Um, yeah, it definitely does most of the time.

[00:11:26] Like when I'm in class and mostly like when I'm in science, via science, it's like a really

[00:11:32] hard subject for me because you take a lot of notes.

[00:11:35] The teacher on the side, you know, like the person who's there to like help out with the

[00:11:40] dyslexia kids.

[00:11:41] Um, I always want to take notes.

[00:11:43] Like I always want to write it.

[00:11:44] Like I like writing a lot and most of the time I can't read my own handwriting.

[00:11:49] Like I can't like see what I'm spelling.

[00:11:51] So she'll come over in the middle of the class where the teacher's like still talking and like

[00:11:57] give me a piece of paper with all the written notes on it.

[00:12:00] And all the kids are like, what is happening?

[00:12:03] I'm like, sorry guys.

[00:12:07] Yeah.

[00:12:08] You're not so lucky.

[00:12:10] You don't get this.

[00:12:11] Yeah.

[00:12:11] But it makes you feel isolated and different.

[00:12:14] I bet.

[00:12:14] Yeah.

[00:12:15] Yeah.

[00:12:15] Even though it's like a helpful step up, that's just kind of one of those things with those

[00:12:20] accommodations is that it's still as an identifier, like where you can't just be one of the other

[00:12:27] kids in the class.

[00:12:28] And I think that that probably is a, if I had a guess, um, does have like, it's how you see

[00:12:35] yourself too.

[00:12:37] Um, so yeah.

[00:12:38] Shannon, when, when rain was younger, was there a moment for you watching her as a parent or

[00:12:46] for your husband potentially where you said, you know, come hell or high water.

[00:12:53] I will do X, Y, and Z for my child that you can remember.

[00:12:58] Yeah.

[00:12:59] I mean, I think we, we met with the principal in kindergarten and, you know, explained to her,

[00:13:07] my husband, and we knew something was going on and we got a lot of pushback and didn't get a lot

[00:13:14] of help.

[00:13:14] And it was honestly at that moment that I was like, I'm not going to let my kid fall through

[00:13:19] the cracks.

[00:13:19] I get emotional talking about it.

[00:13:21] Of course.

[00:13:21] And yeah, it was, that was definitely the moment that, sorry.

[00:13:28] No, this is what we need because you being vulnerable and going back to that moment.

[00:13:35] Like I I've had chills for five minutes because this is trauma.

[00:13:39] It's trauma for you.

[00:13:41] It's trauma for rain.

[00:13:42] Like, this is why we wanted to do this.

[00:13:44] Exactly.

[00:13:45] Why I want parents to understand that when we say dyslexia therapy, we are not just talking

[00:13:52] about remediation.

[00:13:53] We are talking about mental health and these mental health moments stick with us.

[00:14:01] Rain, how do you feel when you see your mom getting emotional about it?

[00:14:04] I'm just curious.

[00:14:04] Yes.

[00:14:05] Well, I will.

[00:14:07] She always tries so hard to help me and stuff like she's always tried to push for teachers

[00:14:13] and everybody to like try their hardest with me.

[00:14:16] These teachers aren't that patient with me.

[00:14:18] Like, yeah, we have no patience with me anymore.

[00:14:21] So she always tries to like talk to somebody and tries to get them to like help me and

[00:14:27] to just basically just try to explain to them what's happening and stuff.

[00:14:31] Like she always tries.

[00:14:33] We have been definitely a duo through all of this and, you know, had many, many conversations

[00:14:39] with many different people.

[00:14:41] And, but I want to say we've also had a ton of help along the way.

[00:14:44] I mean, building that village is so important and having people in your corner.

[00:14:48] And we have been so fortunate to have tutors, teachers, other parents that have been absolutely

[00:14:57] amazing.

[00:14:59] So completely that community of insiders, I guess you almost call it those who have already

[00:15:04] walked the walk or understand to give you valid information.

[00:15:09] You know, I know your husband is dyslexic, but he didn't have the same.

[00:15:13] I mean, we have progressed since then, but you know, it's very piss poor still compared

[00:15:19] to where it should be, but you just don't have access to the right information.

[00:15:23] So those people are so, so important to tell you kind of what direction to go to.

[00:15:29] But so it's like, you're drinking from a fire hose because you're doing that, but you're also

[00:15:33] managing your internal emotions as a mom.

[00:15:37] Like rain as an individual who's having to go through this.

[00:15:41] I'm curious to know rain.

[00:15:43] Like if we move forward, it's been a long time since we kind of started this journey.

[00:15:49] Right.

[00:15:49] So now you're going into high school, right?

[00:15:51] You're going into nine.

[00:15:52] That's huge.

[00:15:53] And I remember watching you, like your pictures going to middle school and as a mama bear,

[00:15:59] you know, who loves you like immediately.

[00:16:01] I'm like, Oh no, but you survived.

[00:16:04] But I want to hear like how your journey has been thus far.

[00:16:09] Is it kind of a lot of the same?

[00:16:11] Did it ever improve?

[00:16:13] Did you ever start feeling a little bit more confident surrounding everything?

[00:16:18] Did your self-concept change a little bit?

[00:16:21] Tell us a little bit more about that.

[00:16:22] Um, it definitely has changed a lot.

[00:16:25] I've had a lot of, a lot more help.

[00:16:27] There's a lot more of awareness with my teachers now.

[00:16:31] When I was younger, dyslexia was more of like unrecognizable.

[00:16:36] But right now, like in this time period, it's more of like, it's okay.

[00:16:39] We'll help you.

[00:16:40] Me personally, I feel like I can be more vocal with my teachers.

[00:16:44] I remember one of my teachers was not giving me the accommodations that I was needing.

[00:16:51] So I went to her and I talked to her about it.

[00:16:54] And like before I would not have done that at all.

[00:16:57] Like I would be scared to do anything like that.

[00:17:02] Yeah.

[00:17:02] And so now you feel comfortable advocating for yourself.

[00:17:05] So that's great.

[00:17:06] And that's a journey to rain.

[00:17:08] Like, I think your ability to advocate now, I love that I've heard growth.

[00:17:12] I think over time that's going to keep growing.

[00:17:15] And I just remind yourself too, that your voice is not just your, it's not just for you.

[00:17:23] I think that your voice creates awareness and exposure to other kids because you aren't the

[00:17:30] only one in the room.

[00:17:31] Can you, because I don't know you from seeing you around, can you describe to me, either

[00:17:38] of you, what the journey looked like after you went to this principal and you said, uh,

[00:17:46] thanks, but no, thanks.

[00:17:48] We're not waiting.

[00:17:49] What did it look like?

[00:17:51] Um, well, we, that's when we ended up at the Scottish, right?

[00:17:54] Because I was like, well, I want to get her tested so we can get her identified at, you

[00:17:58] know, at school.

[00:17:59] So she can get all of these things that we want to have for her.

[00:18:03] They ended up, yes, going through, you know, they accepted from the Scottish, right?

[00:18:08] Her, her diagnosis.

[00:18:10] It was still a challenge because even the therapist they had at school, like it was still a challenge

[00:18:18] getting them to still understand everything.

[00:18:20] And for our listeners, can you describe what the Scottish right is?

[00:18:25] Because in California, people don't know about it.

[00:18:27] Yeah.

[00:18:27] So the Scottish right is a hospital and they have, um, a whole center for dyslexia.

[00:18:35] It's part of like the tape flight program.

[00:18:38] And, um, you can take your kiddos there and get tested for free.

[00:18:42] You get on a wait list and they'll call you and they bring you in for a one day of testing.

[00:18:50] Um, and yeah, it was amazing.

[00:18:52] I mean, you have experts there that are, you know, explaining everything to you, explaining

[00:18:57] how everything works.

[00:18:58] And these are people that are like, I mean, they're experts in their field.

[00:19:01] So the information is incredibly helpful.

[00:19:04] It was a huge blessing to have that.

[00:19:07] It's in Dallas.

[00:19:09] It's in Dallas, Texas is where it's at.

[00:19:11] And I was just going to say, unfortunately it's not free anymore, but it is still considered

[00:19:16] low cost and it's like just accessible, but not just that, you know, that your diagnosis

[00:19:22] is going to be like valid, not just kind of valid.

[00:19:26] It's like, if somebody is going to identify dyslexia, it's going to be them.

[00:19:30] They're not going to get, um, you know, it's not going to be masked by something else,

[00:19:35] et cetera.

[00:19:36] So, um, but it's an amazing resource.

[00:19:39] It's a research facility, um, and they do create curriculum, um, but it is, uh, yeah,

[00:19:45] it's an amazing place.

[00:19:48] So.

[00:19:48] Yeah.

[00:19:49] We had a great experience there.

[00:19:50] I would totally recommend it to anybody.

[00:19:53] Yeah.

[00:19:54] Awesome.

[00:19:54] After that, just the, you know, she did receive therapy for a period of time.

[00:19:58] We ended up kind of in and out of school therapy versus private therapy.

[00:20:02] You know, some of the people they had were not trained in dyslexia.

[00:20:06] It was more like an interventionist, which is not a bad thing, but it's very different

[00:20:10] the way it's, you know, the way it's, uh, presented.

[00:20:14] Um, so we've kind of been in and out of it for gosh, forever.

[00:20:19] Yeah.

[00:20:20] Yeah.

[00:20:21] What does, and this is for rain.

[00:20:23] What does your dyslexia look like?

[00:20:26] Mine looks like to give you an example of kind of what I'm looking for here.

[00:20:30] Mine looks like spelling.

[00:20:32] I, I can't, I mean, it's like when my son was doing his best guess gravel spelling,

[00:20:37] I understood that more than what my husband and daughter were doing.

[00:20:42] Like, it's a thing.

[00:20:43] It's a thing.

[00:20:44] And also reading quickly, never going to happen.

[00:20:51] Reading content that is not enjoyable to me.

[00:20:56] Meaning like, if I don't like science, like for instance, if the subject and science isn't

[00:21:01] something I'm interested in, it's like, what?

[00:21:04] It's really not going to happen for me.

[00:21:06] I'm going to be 42 this year.

[00:21:08] This is still true for me.

[00:21:11] So that's what, that's what my dyslexia is.

[00:21:14] What is yours?

[00:21:15] Um, it's mostly spelling.

[00:21:17] Like, the notes, we have a lot of notes in school.

[00:21:23] Like, it's ridiculous.

[00:21:25] I do have a little bit of reading.

[00:21:27] Like, I like to read out loud.

[00:21:30] Like, I would like to read out loud.

[00:21:32] But it's hard for me because I all stutter a lot.

[00:21:37] Like, I stutter a lot because I get so nervous whenever I read out loud.

[00:21:41] Like, I'll be stuck on a word for like a couple of minutes and everybody will start looking

[00:21:46] at me and I'm like, uh, and the teacher will have to like, help me read the word.

[00:21:51] And I'm like, okay.

[00:21:54] So are you the, are you the one that likes to like avoid it?

[00:21:58] Or some dyslexics actually love to read, but only comic books.

[00:22:02] Yeah.

[00:22:02] So like, what's, what is your relationship to reading?

[00:22:06] I actually love reading.

[00:22:09] Like, I really do like it.

[00:22:11] Um, I actually read my first full book, I think like last year and I didn't understand

[00:22:18] any of it.

[00:22:20] So after I read it, I went on audible and I like actually understand it.

[00:22:26] But, um, this year I actually read this really good book.

[00:22:29] I forgot what it's called.

[00:22:30] It's that rabbit book, that China rabbit book.

[00:22:32] It's like really good.

[00:22:33] And I understood like everything, but the book, what was the name of it?

[00:22:39] So it's the, um, miraculous journey of Edward Tulane.

[00:22:45] Tulane.

[00:22:46] Yeah.

[00:22:48] Okay.

[00:22:49] It's my favorite book.

[00:22:50] Um, and then I also have like a bunch of audio books.

[00:22:53] I have like a whole list of audio books that I listened to.

[00:22:56] Yeah.

[00:22:57] Yeah.

[00:22:58] Information is so much more accessible now.

[00:23:00] It's amazing.

[00:23:01] The difference.

[00:23:02] What I want to hear now, like, what are your plans for the future?

[00:23:08] I want, I really like the path I'm on right now, actually.

[00:23:12] Um, all my teachers were great this year.

[00:23:15] They were really helpful.

[00:23:17] They understood everything.

[00:23:20] Yeah.

[00:23:21] What do you want to do for the future?

[00:23:23] I don't know.

[00:23:23] You don't know.

[00:23:24] I don't know.

[00:23:25] I mean, she's talked about wanting to be a teacher.

[00:23:28] Rain is, I think one of the things she's very, very creative, which I know a lot of dyslexic

[00:23:34] people kind of want these.

[00:23:36] She's extremely artistic.

[00:23:38] Um, which is a.

[00:23:39] What type of art?

[00:23:40] What type of art?

[00:23:42] Um, I really like painting.

[00:23:45] I like draw like doodles, like intricate design.

[00:23:51] Yeah.

[00:23:51] I'll show y'all.

[00:23:53] Yeah.

[00:23:54] When did you learn to, when did you learn you could draw?

[00:23:58] Whoa.

[00:23:59] That is amazing.

[00:24:00] And for anyone just listening, um, she's showing us her artwork right now and they look like,

[00:24:06] is it like a mandala?

[00:24:08] Is that the, oh my gosh, the intricacy of what you've done is insanity.

[00:24:13] Yeah.

[00:24:14] You could be a tattoo artist, honestly.

[00:24:16] Like that's incredible.

[00:24:18] That's incredible.

[00:24:20] We wanted to start like a henna business.

[00:24:25] Oh my gosh.

[00:24:26] How cool.

[00:24:27] That's a talent I could never achieve.

[00:24:29] Like I barely even draw a stick figure when my kids are asking me to.

[00:24:33] So, um, that's amazing girl.

[00:24:36] When did you start drawing?

[00:24:38] Um, since I was really young, I really got into during homeschool though.

[00:24:44] Like, yes, we did.

[00:24:45] We homeschooled for a year.

[00:24:47] Um, yeah, she has always been super artistic.

[00:24:52] I think any kind of class that is, um, the teacher, once the teachers find out she's creative

[00:24:58] and artistic, they're like, oh, well, we're just going to have you do a book report where

[00:25:02] you're doing an art piece.

[00:25:05] Um, so anything, and they're very, like, they've been really open to it, especially in middle

[00:25:10] school, um, to letting her, you know, do her projects in a more artistic format.

[00:25:16] That's amazing that you've encountered teachers like that.

[00:25:20] Um, that is so cool.

[00:25:21] Are you worried a little bit now that we're moving into high school that you have to kind

[00:25:26] of like start that journey again?

[00:25:28] Very.

[00:25:29] Yeah.

[00:25:29] We're, I'm, I'm very nervous.

[00:25:31] I think she is.

[00:25:32] Um, just, you're starting over with everything's different now.

[00:25:36] The administration is different.

[00:25:37] I mean, we'd kind of gotten to know everybody and they knew rain really well.

[00:25:41] And of course, you know, high school is a whole different thing.

[00:25:44] Now everything counts on your transcript and it's your credits and your GPA and it's all

[00:25:49] of those things now.

[00:25:51] So yeah, it's definitely very, very nerve wracking.

[00:25:55] I think.

[00:25:55] Well, I mostly, I actually don't want to go into high school.

[00:25:59] Actually, um, the people, like I'm going to have a new environment, new teachers.

[00:26:05] Like I loved my teachers this year.

[00:26:07] They were all so perfect.

[00:26:08] Like, I don't want to leave them.

[00:26:10] Like, I love them.

[00:26:11] They're like my people.

[00:26:13] So like, they all understood like everything with going on with me.

[00:26:19] So that's one thing I'm nervous about next year is like the teachers.

[00:26:22] Definitely.

[00:26:23] The, the advocate in me just has to say that, you know,

[00:26:28] you can make the same environment as you had in middle school.

[00:26:32] And you like, I look at it as, as you are the gift that keeps on giving, because as you

[00:26:39] go through the process and you go educate another teacher on what you need, you're paving the

[00:26:45] way for all the other kids that are so scared to talk about it and don't, maybe they don't

[00:26:52] have the family support or the practice.

[00:26:54] The more you practice, the more it becomes really easy.

[00:27:01] And you're going to learn very quickly who the teachers are that like, you know, your mom

[00:27:07] may need to follow up with a little video clip of what is dyslexia and things like that.

[00:27:13] Right.

[00:27:14] Has it become easier in a way?

[00:27:18] Definitely.

[00:27:18] Um, I remember the first time, like she actually made me like say something.

[00:27:23] I think it was like last year.

[00:27:25] It was this past school year.

[00:27:26] Yeah.

[00:27:27] I'm like, you're going to have to start doing this.

[00:27:30] You need to say something.

[00:27:33] And well, I said something, this doesn't have anything to do with dyslexia, but I said something

[00:27:37] to my art teacher about assignment that I didn't turn in, but I had it.

[00:27:43] It just was past its due date.

[00:27:45] So I talked to him about it and he like pulled me aside and he was like, brain, that was like

[00:27:49] really brave of you for coming up to me.

[00:27:51] I want you to do that for everything.

[00:27:53] These teachers always want to try to help you like get on the grade and everything.

[00:27:58] Yeah.

[00:27:58] I mean, I think after that, he said that, I think she, I mean, that just that positive

[00:28:05] reinforcement that you did the right thing by coming in to me.

[00:28:07] I mean, I'm telling you the teachers that we had were, I mean, every teacher this year

[00:28:13] was literally sent from heaven.

[00:28:15] I think, um, I'm like, where is the school?

[00:28:18] Let's duplicate it.

[00:28:20] These teachers need kudos.

[00:28:22] So, you know, say where it is.

[00:28:23] Where were you at?

[00:28:24] We at dripping Springs middle school.

[00:28:27] All right.

[00:28:27] Dripping Springs.

[00:28:28] Woo.

[00:28:29] Just kidding.

[00:28:31] Well, in middle school is, is a scary place.

[00:28:33] Honestly, I was really scared.

[00:28:35] Um, but rain, I mean, just showed tremendous growth maturity wise and academically.

[00:28:42] And I think they really fostered that there, her being able to speak up for herself and,

[00:28:47] um, which is huge that, you know, adults are listening.

[00:28:51] So totally.

[00:28:52] And sometimes it doesn't feel like this, right.

[00:28:54] Especially for like Aaron, who's fighting the schools.

[00:28:57] And I hear from parents all the time who are fighting the schools, but at the core of

[00:29:02] it, right.

[00:29:03] Like teachers went into the profession for a reason because they have that love and passion

[00:29:08] and regardless of whether or not they understand dyslexia, which I would say 95% of them do

[00:29:15] not, but they do have that care and love, right?

[00:29:19] Like, and they do want to foster you, your development and support you.

[00:29:25] So, and so you being that advocate to speak up is like, you know, it might trigger them

[00:29:31] to take that next step and learn more and be better so they can be better for the next person.

[00:29:37] So I think that if you take all those schools that you're learning and stashing away in

[00:29:42] your toolbox, you're going to get there and you're going to be awesome.

[00:29:46] So what advice do you have?

[00:29:48] And this could be for both of you guys that you can give others with dyslexia or those

[00:29:53] who are just starting the journey?

[00:29:55] Um, I would say just don't be embarrassed.

[00:29:59] I mean, I remember, um, there's this one accommodation and it's on the computer and it's during

[00:30:05] tests and I have to put on headphones in front of everybody.

[00:30:08] And, um, my teacher, she told me, don't be embarrassed about that.

[00:30:13] Don't be embarrassed that you need extra help.

[00:30:15] Like you need it.

[00:30:17] So don't be embarrassed about it.

[00:30:18] So like, I'm not embarrassed anymore.

[00:30:22] Like I really confident in all of that stuff.

[00:30:27] Like I will put on headphones in the middle of the test and I don't care if everybody

[00:30:32] looks at me.

[00:30:34] It's totally true.

[00:30:36] And what would you say if somebody says like, but you're telling me not to be embarrassed,

[00:30:41] but I am, or would you say we'll do it anyways, even if you're embarrassed?

[00:30:45] Cause it gets easier.

[00:30:46] Yeah.

[00:30:47] I mean, don't be embarrassed about something that helps you.

[00:30:51] Like if it helps you, then use it.

[00:30:54] Yeah.

[00:30:55] You can't, you shouldn't be embarrassed about something that helps you.

[00:30:58] Yeah.

[00:30:59] Is there anything you want parents to know when they're at the beginning of the journey,

[00:31:03] maybe, or when they're at that peak moment where they're knee deep in intervention and

[00:31:09] they're going four days a week and they're it's in the, it's intense.

[00:31:14] Just what message would you want to give to parents that are going through this?

[00:31:20] And I think the biggest thing for me is, you know, build your own support system and have

[00:31:26] people around you that, you know, you can ask questions to that you trust, keep having

[00:31:32] the hard conversations with school.

[00:31:34] I know some of them are, they're really, really tough and it's very emotional.

[00:31:40] It's a very, I mean, every time I talk about it, think about it, I get emotions and I keep

[00:31:45] having the hard conversations and have that support group.

[00:31:49] I can't even stress how, however that looks for you, you know, whether it's a friend or

[00:31:54] a, you know, a teacher or somebody that you feel like you can go to with any of it.

[00:31:59] Um, our village has been the, one of the most important parts of our journey.

[00:32:06] That's awesome.

[00:32:07] I'm so happy you found that.

[00:32:08] If there was another parent that came to you and said, I just learned my daughter's dyslexic,

[00:32:15] are they going to be okay?

[00:32:17] Like what would be your response?

[00:32:19] They're going to be okay.

[00:32:20] You just, you need to be open to different things and more possibilities and different paths.

[00:32:28] You just need to be open, I guess.

[00:32:30] I don't know.

[00:32:32] Like open that it might not be the way that they think it's going to be.

[00:32:36] Yeah.

[00:32:36] Like they're going to take a whole different path than what you think it's going to look

[00:32:42] like or what they even think what it's going to look like.

[00:32:45] It's going to be different from what you, what, what you think.

[00:32:50] Mm-hmm.

[00:32:50] Mm-hmm.

[00:32:51] Yeah.

[00:32:51] Yeah.

[00:32:52] We're definitely in that period of like, it kind of is what it is, so to speak.

[00:32:57] Like we've done so much remediation and honestly, it's become kind of part of who she is.

[00:33:02] Like what's almost like, oh, rain, you know, we almost kind of tease her and now she laughs

[00:33:07] and it's like, you know, she'll spell something funny.

[00:33:10] And we're like, uh, and now it's just kind of, which is kind of her.

[00:33:16] So.

[00:33:17] Yeah.

[00:33:17] It's what makes you one of your unique pieces.

[00:33:21] Yeah.

[00:33:21] Right.

[00:33:22] Mm-hmm.

[00:33:23] And it doesn't define you or don't let it.

[00:33:26] Right.

[00:33:27] Or let it and be totally proud of it.

[00:33:30] Yeah, exactly.

[00:33:30] Right.

[00:33:30] We get very interesting text messages all the time.

[00:33:34] Um, and some of them are, yeah, I mean, they're very interesting.

[00:33:39] Her friends now all know they're like, okay, this is from rain.

[00:33:43] Right.

[00:33:46] Doesn't need to decode my messages and everything.

[00:33:49] Right.

[00:33:51] That's awesome.

[00:33:52] Just read it out loud phonetically.

[00:33:54] Exactly.

[00:33:55] Exactly.

[00:33:56] If you could craft your life again, rain, would you choose for dyslexia to still be part of

[00:34:02] your experience?

[00:34:03] Yes.

[00:34:04] I would.

[00:34:05] Yeah.

[00:34:05] Tell me why.

[00:34:06] Um, it definitely has built character in me.

[00:34:10] It's taught me to do things.

[00:34:13] If, if I didn't have dyslexia, I wouldn't know how to do certain things at this point.

[00:34:19] It has taught me how to like stand up for myself and how to advocate for myself and just

[00:34:24] how to be like a person, how to live.

[00:34:28] I am so proud of you.

[00:34:30] And I have chills if you couldn't tell that I was trying to show you.

[00:34:32] Like, um, you know, just, I think that mom's heart right there has got to be swelling to

[00:34:38] just like to listen to that.

[00:34:40] I think we're all moms here.

[00:34:42] And to hear my daughter say that, how much pride I would have.

[00:34:46] Yeah.

[00:34:47] I wouldn't change a thing.

[00:34:48] Honestly, I wouldn't as hard as it's been.

[00:34:50] And, um, is it, you know, emotional as it's been and going through all of it, I wouldn't

[00:34:55] change any of it.

[00:34:57] It is part of who she is.

[00:34:59] And now it's just like, that's just her.

[00:35:01] And it's brought out other awesome qualities in her.

[00:35:04] She's very outspoken.

[00:35:06] She's, um, you know, willing to take risks.

[00:35:09] Um, she pushes really hard.

[00:35:11] She works really hard because she knows she has to.

[00:35:16] Well, I can't wait to hear about how high school goes.

[00:35:19] We have to bring you back in four years.

[00:35:21] Oh my gosh.

[00:35:21] Yes.

[00:35:22] Yes.

[00:35:22] And I was also going to say when we circle back, whether it's after high school or when

[00:35:29] you're 40 or whatever, you're going to remember this time and you're going to be, and you already

[00:35:35] are speaking from this level of maturity that I don't hear 14 year olds nowadays speaking

[00:35:44] from rain.

[00:35:46] You and I both know that, and I can say this with pretty much like absolute that you understand

[00:35:53] what I mean, even though it's built character, there is another piece that we're like, it

[00:35:59] sucks.

[00:36:00] Like it does suck.

[00:36:01] It still sucks.

[00:36:02] It's there, there are times where it royally, uh, it's not fun.

[00:36:08] It blows.

[00:36:09] It really, really.

[00:36:10] So there's that piece too, where, yeah, we can like talk in this space of being on a podcast

[00:36:16] and wanting to share.

[00:36:18] And, and that's genuinely, we want to share both sides of it because the other pieces,

[00:36:22] there's going to be somebody who listens to this.

[00:36:26] That is like, yeah, all you guys that are saying it's all rainbows and butterflies and

[00:36:30] a learning experience.

[00:36:31] You guys like must not really be dyslexic because I'm sure there was, there's been a day or 35

[00:36:39] or hundreds where we're not feeling the positivity.

[00:36:45] And we're like, yeah, you guys years, years, years.

[00:36:51] Yeah.

[00:36:51] Years of like, no.

[00:36:53] And even if you want to spin it, you know, bleep you or what, I don't know if this is going

[00:36:59] to be explicit or not, but right.

[00:37:01] Like you don't know what it's like.

[00:37:04] And I think something, I don't know if you relate, if you and your dad talk about it,

[00:37:08] but I know with like my dad, I can talk to my dad about it because I know he gets it.

[00:37:13] And I feel that there is so much power and, and I will leave you with this question.

[00:37:19] Do you feel connected to those that are dyslexic?

[00:37:23] Other people that you've met along your journey?

[00:37:26] Do you feel like there's an unspoken understanding?

[00:37:29] Yeah, I definitely, I definitely do.

[00:37:31] My best friend, she's also dyslexic and we are really close.

[00:37:38] Like we FaceTime like all the time, like every second.

[00:37:41] And we will be like, how do you spell this?

[00:37:44] Like, we'll be talking to each other.

[00:37:46] How do you spell this?

[00:37:47] And I'm like, I don't know.

[00:37:48] How do you spell this?

[00:37:48] I'm like, I don't know.

[00:37:50] And to know that you guys are still like besties and you're like, yeah, I don't know.

[00:37:56] I don't know.

[00:37:57] It's like, you almost see that like, but I love you.

[00:37:59] And like, you're freaking awesome.

[00:38:00] And I want to ask you because it's kind of funny that we both don't know how to spell

[00:38:05] it, but is it funny?

[00:38:06] No, not really, but it is kind of right.

[00:38:08] It's that unspoken relationship that you can go, oh, you get it.

[00:38:12] Oh, okay.

[00:38:13] It's fine.

[00:38:14] Right.

[00:38:15] Yeah.

[00:38:16] Well, her dad will like always share tricks with her because, you know, back when we were

[00:38:22] kids, you didn't have all the same things.

[00:38:24] So now he like, he's like, oh, I get it.

[00:38:26] It's fine.

[00:38:27] Whatever.

[00:38:27] We'll figure it out, you know, and I'll do it.

[00:38:30] So, and it's great that you have like an example too, right?

[00:38:34] Like you can see that your dad has been successful in life.

[00:38:39] You don't, if this is not like a death sentence, right?

[00:38:43] This is not the end of the world.

[00:38:45] And, you know, have that empathy too.

[00:38:48] I think that's huge that you have that in your back pocket.

[00:38:51] Um, so I think you're going to do great things in the world, right?

[00:38:54] And I can't wait to watch it on Facebook if it's still around.

[00:38:59] Thanks for joining us on the Don't Call On Me podcast.

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