10-Year-Old Olivia Shares How Dyslexia Changed Her Life | Don't Call On Me Ep. 42

[00:00:00] I Am Unique This Is Like A One In A Million Thing It's One Out Of Ten I Used To Think It's Me Against The World I'm Just Stupid I'm Dumb I Can't Learn Now It's Changed From I'm Dumb To I'm Special I Am One In A Million This Was A Gift It's Not A Burden Sometimes It Might Feel Like A Burden But It's A Gift It Will Help Me Later On In Life Just

[00:00:29] Be A Kid Right Now And Have Fun With It This Is Megan Owner Of Dyslexia On Demand And I'm Eryn Owner Of Advocate To Educate And We Are The Don't Call On Me Podcast We Are Here To Talk About Dyslexia To Remove The Stigma To Hear What Families Really Go Through And To Share Their Stories In Both Of Our Businesses And Personal Experiences On A Daily Basis

[00:00:59] We Listen To People Telling Their Stories Many Of Heartbreak Many Of Struggle But Most All Have A Silver Lining Even Eventually It's All About The Stories The More We Share The More We Share The More We Realize We Aren't Alone And We Are A Community No A Tribe Standing Together

[00:01:20] The Don't Call On Me Podcast Is Brought To You By Dyslexia On Demand And Advocate To Educate Alright, Welcome Back Listeners To The Don't Call On Me Podcast Where We Share Stories About What It's Like To Have Dyslexia And What Families Really Go Through Today We Have A Very Excited Guest Miss Olivia McDonald And Her Mom Chrissy McDonald

[00:01:49] Can You Guys Share With Us Where You're From How Old You Are And Just A Little Bit About Yourself Okay, So My Name Is Olivia We're From Atlanta, Georgia And Yeah, I Have Dyslexia It's Just Something That Stuck On To Me And Yeah And How Old Are You And What Grade Are You In? I'm Just Turned 10 And I'm Going Into Fourth Exciting Okay, Chrissy, Can You Introduce Yourself?

[00:02:18] Sure, I'm Chrissy McDonald And I'm Olivia's Mom And I'm Proud Of Her For All That She's Accomplished And I Have Another Daughter, Isla As Well Alright, Well, I'll Go Ahead And Lead Us Off With The First Question And We Obviously Have Two People Here So I Think I Want To Hear From Olivia First On This One And Then Mom Can Answer The Same Question From Her Perspective Of The Journey That She Went Through With Finding Out That You Had

[00:02:47] Dyslexia So I Want You To Share So I Want You To Share With Us Olivia A Little Bit More About Your Dyslexia And Learning That You Had Dyslexia And What That Process Looked Like When Did You First Start Feeling Something Was Different? How Did You Feel When You Learned That You Had Dyslexia? How Did You Know How Did Things Change For You? Tell Us More About That

[00:03:11] I Was Just Going Into My New School I Was In Kindergarten Yeah, Kindergarten And We Were Learning The Word The And To Be Honest I Was Struggling I Felt Like I'm The Only One I Was Bridged Off And It Was Difficult And Then Over Time As I Began Going Into Seconds I Started Noticing More About Me I Started Noticing More About Me Struggling And Then When I Got Tested I Was Like What The Heck Is This?

[00:03:39] This Was So Fun But What Is Dyslexia? Okay What Is This? People Tell Me! Mm-hmm Can I Back You Up A Smidge And Ask You What Was School Like In Kindergarten For You? And Even First Grade What Are The Things You Liked And What Are The Things That You Didn't Like If There Were Things You Didn't Like? To Be Honest Kindergarten Was So Hard In Fact First Grade Was Easier It Was Way Easier

[00:04:09] Like We Were Learning Like Four Digit Numbers In Kindergarten And Then I Felt Like That Like I Was Just Struggling I Mean I Tried To Work Hard To Catch Up But I Felt Like I Was Like Working Hard Enough Like Kids Would Look At Me In Class It Was So Difficult And First Grade It Was My Relief I Was In Heaven So Not To Interrupt Her

[00:04:37] I Think What Helped Her In First Grade Her Teacher Had A Dyslexic Daughter And She Went On To Teach At A Specialty School And She Was Actually Sending Me Home Special Homework She Spent Her Own Time Making Binders For Olivia To Do Her Own Homework So I Don't Think It Was That The Work Was Easier In First Grade I Think It Was The Teacher She Was A Really Good Teacher Yeah That Is It Yeah

[00:05:06] No No Olivia And Chrissy That Is What It Takes The Difference Olivia In The Dread Of Kindergarten And Then The It Was My Saving Grace In First Grade And Hearing The Reason Is Really Why We Made This Podcast Honest To God Because We Need Our Teachers To Hear The Difference They Don't Have To Be Experts At The Time

[00:05:36] In Dyslexia It Was Helpful But The Awareness That The Teacher Had That I Have To Do Something Different And Maybe You Know This One Went On To Do More More In Dyslexia But In General It'S The Awareness Of Wait Hold On This Child Needs Something Unique And Different And I Can Actually Emotionally Change The Trajectory Of That Child's Life In An Instant By Making Changes That You Can Google

[00:06:06] Which Is It Drives You Know Drives Me Insane Because I Just Wish More People Would Take The Time To Tweak The Work Just A Smidge So That We Can Hear All The Kids Rejoice Like Olivia Olivia Tell Us What Happened After You Had This Great First Grade Experience Then What? Second Grade I Was Back Basically At A Kindergarten I Will Not Give

[00:06:35] My Teacher's Name Of Second Grade I Will Call Her Miss R And I Don'T Know I She Didn'T Really Notice My Dyslexia She Like Second Grade Different Story The School Rejected Me Being Dyslexic The Principals Were Even Rejecting Me Getting Tested And Then Bravely My Mom Stood Up To Them She'S So Brave She'S My Hero

[00:07:05] And She Stood Up And That'S How I Got Tested Thanks To You Mom Thank You Oh That Is So Sweet Oh My Gosh I'M Like Who Are You? Like You're You Are An Angel From Heaven My Friend Like What? And Yes Your Mom Is Also Brave But Guess What? She Had No Choice Because She'S Your Mother And She Would Have Done Anything It Took Yeah So Christy Tell Us A Little Bit

[00:07:34] About What Happened Kindergarten I'LL Say I Definitely Thought Olivia Was Stressed Out But I Had No Idea It Was Related To Reading You Know That'S When They Were First Introducing Letters And Words And It Was More Than Pre-K So The Reason I Knew She Was Stressed Out Is Because Every Day I Picked Her Up From School Her Arms Were Covered In Blood Where She Had Just Been Picking Picking Picking At Her Arms And Every Night I Would Cover Them Up With Scar Cream Put Band-Aids On Them

[00:08:03] You Know I Talked To The Teacher About It She Had Noticed It I Asked If She Seemed Stressed But You Know I Had No Idea It Was Because Of The Reading I Thought Just I'M Kind Of An An Anxious Person Maybe She'S An Anxious Person Too So I Bought Her This Fidget Necklace And She Kept Picking I Mean It Really Continued The Picking Continued Until Last Year When She Started Her You Know Specialized Dyslexia School And She Still Has Scars On Her Arms From Just The Stress

[00:08:32] Of You Know She'S A Perfectionist And She Works Hard And She Knew That Her Hard Work Wasn'T Solving Something Like It Normally Does But You Know But The Reading Didn'T Come Up In Kindergarten So She Moved On To First Grade And That'S Where She Had The Teacher That Was You Know Really In Tuned You Know And Going Back She Went To A Small Private School But They Didn'T Have Orton Gillingham Training For The Teachers Or Really Any Kind Of Training For The Teachers But This Teacher You Know

[00:09:02] She She Really Went Above And Beyond And I Think That'S What Lowered Olivia's Stress And Then By About October November First Grade She Recommended That Olivia Do This Extra Program At School Called Pathways Which Is Where They Pull Kids Out Of The Classroom And Work With Them In A Small Group Maybe 10 Kids One Teacher And It Could Be Like Reading Math Whatever They're Having A Problem With They Just Lumped Them In A Big Group At The End Of Second Grade Didn'T Sit Right For Me You Know She Was Coming Out Of The Library

[00:09:31] On Library Day With These Like Big Chapter Books Where Her Friends Had Age Level Appropriate Books You Know And I Thought She Wants To Read We Got Her A Google For Her Room She'd Stay Up All Night Listening To These Science Podcast And I Mean She Wanted To Learn Like She Had A Really Deep Knowledge For Learning So I Thought If She Could Check If She Was Able To Read She'd Be Checking Out Appropriate Level Books At The Library This Doesn't Make Sense So It Just Bugged Me All Summer You Know It Was Like The School

[00:10:01] Keeps Telling Me She Doesn't Need A Psych Ed A Val That All She Needs Is This Pathways Program Which I Later Found Out The Pathways Program Was To Kind Of Fund Their New Building So They Were Kind Of Oh No Everybody In Pathways And 10 Kids One Teacher That's Not Really Giving You Yeah Nobody It Was Really Just Isolating Her And Making It Worse So Really Over That Summer I Said I Kept Telling My Husband In Second Grade I'm Going To Get Her Tested I Just Don't This Doesn't Make Sense

[00:10:30] I'm Going To Get The Psych Ed A Val Which I'm Sure It's State By State You Know In Georgia It's Like A It's About $5,000 Five Day Process So It's A Big Deal If People Are Telling You You Don't Need It To Go Do It And Then This Is Kind Of A Crazy Story But That Summer My Husband And I Took Like A Trip On Our Own We Went To Glacier National Park And We Started Walking On This Trail And We Saw Signs That There Had Been A Bear Recently To Kind Of Like Watch Your Back There's Been A Bear So We Saw This Other Couple Walking And We're Like You Guys Want To Walk Together You Know There's Been A Bear Recently

[00:11:00] And My Husband Was Talking To The Guy I Was Talking To The Woman And What Do You Do For A Living She's A Dyslexia Teacher In Illinois So I Just Start Talking Her Ear Off And She Just She Was Like You Gotta Get Your Psych Edival You Know When We Got Through And The Bears Didn't Get Us When We Got Back Out I Made An Appointment To Get A Psych Edival This Great Great Woman She Was Great You Know But We Didn't Get That Diagnosis Until I'd Say It Was Like September

[00:11:29] Of Second Grade So Back To School Second Grade Her Homeroom Teacher Is Saying Why Is Living Pathways She Reads Fine She Doesn't Even Need Pathways She's Fine And This Pathways Teacher Is Telling Me Yeah I Think By Second Semester Olivia Won't Need Pathways Anymore You Know She's Fine She Has All You Know She Has All A's And You Know It's Cause She's Killing Herself It Takes Like Three Hours To Do Right So They're Telling Me She Doesn't Even Need Pathways Anymore She's Fine

[00:11:59] She's Gonna Be Good To Go By Second Semester And I'm Thinking Well I've Already Lined Up This Evaluation We're Gonna Do It So She Goes In Goes To Her Evaluation You Know The Five Days Pass That She Goes Through It All Another Week Passes We Get Our Results We Go In And Meet With The Psychiatrist Who Tells Us That Olivia Does Have Dyslexia And Also Shares With Us How High Her IQ Is Which I Just You Know Felt Like Happy

[00:12:29] I Felt Like Well Now We Know What's Going On And Yeah Like We We Can Fix This You Know There's Help We Can Fix This So I Was Happy And I Just Wanted To Figure Out The Best Way To Handle Telling Olivia Because Like She Said You Know Next Thing She Knows She Did This Long Evaluation And Then We Say You Have Dyslexia What Is This You Know So That Was That Was Kind Of Her Journey To Getting The Diagnosis I'm So Glad That You Followed

[00:12:59] Your Mama Gut Right And Obviously With A Little Bit More Of A Helpful Push From A Dyslexia Specialist Because I Think That Your Experience Of The School Suggesting Or You Know Pushing Back On You I Think That That Is Really Really Common And I Also Just Want To Point Out Misunderstanding To That A Lot Of People Have Of Dyslexia And That Is That Someone With Dyslexia

[00:13:29] Cannot Read And That Is Actually Not True What Is True Is That The Wrong Part Of The Brain Is Trying To Process That Language And It Can't Do It Effectively Like The Parts Of The Brain That Were Actually You Know Designed To Be Task With That Automatic Processing And So Somebody With Like Olivia With Dyslexia Is Going To Be Reading Through Memorization And Context And That Is Why We Still

[00:13:59] Can Make Great Grades That Is Why She Was Masking And Showing And In Pathways They Are Sitting There Saying She Is Doing Wonderful We Are Getting Great Grades Why Would You Want To Do That But Let Is Add One More Sprinkle In There And That Is That Olivia Has A Very High IQ That Actually Goes Along With Dyslexia A Lot And So Those Kids Are Going To Be The Ones That Can Mask That Much Stronger Olivia Let Me Ask You Something

[00:14:28] Can You Tell Us Like What If You Knew When You Were At School Did You Know You Were Nervous And You Were Like Scratching Or Picking At Your Arms Did You Like Consciously That Means Do You Know What Consciously Means It Means Like Did You In That Moment Know I I'm Doing This Because I'm Nervous Did You Know That Or You Didn't Know Like How Did You Show Your Mom What Was Going On I Got So

[00:14:58] I Need To Look At Me I Need To Be This Exact Thing Not How I'm Made And I Got Nervous And Like When A Teacher Was Talking I Knew What I Was Doing But I Didn't Like Like What You Said I Was Consciously Doing It

[00:15:28] Did The School Notice Any Of That Anxious Behavior Did The School Reach Out To You And Say Anything To You No The School Didn't Notice It And I Actually Noticed On Her Psych Ed A Val Where My Husband And Each Had To Rate Different Things And One Was Her Anxiety And The Had Rated It Really Low So You Know They Thought She Was Fine I Think They Keep Pushing It Under The Rug After I Shared The

[00:15:57] Diagnosis With Them We Sat Down With The Principal And The Head Of The Pathways Program And They Continued To Tell Me The Diagnosis Was Wrong So After I Sat Down With The Principal And The Head Of Pathways And Gave Them Her In Front Of The Class For Spelling Bee Oh Wow And Didn't Give Her The Option To Hey You Want To Go To Something Else Do You Want To Go

[00:16:27] To The Pathways Class Would Be A Great Option She Came Home Just Crushed Just Completely Crushed So I Emailed The Principal You Know All Up On The Conversation We Had 24 Hours Ago With Her Psych Ed Eval And The Accommodations To Which The Principal Emailed Me Back That She Would Like To Do Her Own Evaluation On Olivia Yeah And Then I Emailed Her Back Saying You May

[00:16:57] Not Speak To My Daughter Because She's Been Through Enough Evaluating And Then The Principal Called My Husband To Basically Tell Him So And This Is Still First Semester Of The School Year So I'm Just Thinking Olivia Has Got To Get Just Finished Out At This School And You Know I Hate Sending Her There Because Now I'm Afraid They're Going To

[00:17:27] Retaliate Against Her They're Definitely Not Honoring Her Accommodations They Don't Notice That She's Stressed And It Seems Like Things Snowballing To Get Worse Yeah Absolutely That Is So Hard To Hear Because You Know Olivia I Also Want You To Know That Your Mom's Situation And Your Situation Unfortunately It's Everywhere I Mean This Is Happening Everywhere And That's Why People Like Megan And I Get So Excited About

[00:17:57] Talking To Because It Feels So Terrible When You're In It So Incredibly Terrible And You Feel Like You're The Only Ones Going Through It And Then When You Start To Look Around You Start To Recognize That Unfortunately It Really Is Happening In Every State And There's A lot To Learn In This Area So Our Goal Is To Share Your Story Along With

[00:18:27] Other Stories Like It So That More People Can Go Oh Okay Well Olivia Was Smiling At The End Of This And Chrissy Was Smiling At The End So We Know It Didn't Turn Out Terrible So Let's Continue To Hear What Happened And We Really Want Them To See The Positives Of What Comes Out Of This Strength Tell Us Now A Little Bit More About We Have Secured This Identification Or This Diagnosis

[00:18:56] What Was Next It Sounds From What I Picked Up That We've Changed Schools You Know How Is Dyslexia Impacting You Now We'll Start With Olivia A Bit Like About The Second Semester Like This Is Diving In Now We're Diving Into I'm Free I Got The I Just Hated It Like I Felt

[00:19:26] Stressed I Would Have To Take Books Home With Me That Made Me Even More Stressed But Then Miss Lucy Came Along She's The Best Tutor Ever She Has These Two Dogs Molly And Charlie She's So Nice Like We Get To Play Games And Then We Do Spelling I Feel Like I'm Smart When I'm With Her The Other Tutors I Felt Like I Was Nothing Miss Lucy

[00:19:55] She Is The Best Then I'm Going Into Skank And Wow I Mean Wait Can you Tell us What That Is We May Want To Tell You What Skank Is It's A Funny Spelling And A Funny Word I Know S C H E N C Skank That's The School I Go To Now Every Student There Is Dislike Dyslexic Every Teacher Is Specially

[00:20:25] Trained For Us Everything Is Like Is Made For Us Like You Cannot Go To The School If You're Not Dyslexic They're Here For You Like Kids Are Getting Special Stools And Like We're Getting Fidgets And There's Also This Special Person And You Could Go To Her If You're Feeling Stressed Or Stuff She Helps You Like It's A Great Environment And I Love Harry Potter And

[00:20:55] It's Themed Harry Potter There Are Houses There Is A Sorting Ceremony I'm In Tara There's So Tender Souls And Agnes Mom So Can You Share With Us The Journey Into Like Did You Leave Public School And Go To Private And Total private Pay And Everything Or So She Was Always At Private School Even The Pathway Stuff And All That Was Even In A Small Classroom Private School Setting After We Got The Diagnosis And It Wasn't Working

[00:21:25] That's When We Started Tutoring With Her Current Tutor You Know The School Was Telling Me You Don't Need Tutoring You Don't Need Pathways I Was Reading The Credentials Of The Pathways Teachers and They Didn't Even Have Training So It Was Confusing So I Looked Up Specific Orton Gillingham Teachers And Found This Teacher On The Web And This

[00:21:57] Was Looking At Olivia's Homework And Saying I Don't Know What They're Teaching Them This Stuff Is Not Even Making Sense Just Stop Doing Our Homework And I Can't I'm Not Going To Work On This Homework With Her So I Just Started Throwing Her Homework Away And At This Point Was Like I But You Know I Was Trying To Figure Out You Know I Knew We Needed To Go To Another School After This Wherever It Was It Just Couldn't Be

[00:22:27] There So Luckily We Live In Atlanta And There Are Several Private Schools That Have Additional Help Additional programs That Are Good And We Actually Have Several Schools That Are Remediational Schools For Dyslexic Kids You Go You Know Two To Four Years And Then You Move On But I Didn't Think She Would Get Into Any Of Those Because Her Principal Had Told Me She Would They Said She She Not Dyslexic She Is Not Going To Get In I Wouldn't Even Apply There They

[00:22:57] Didn't Take My Child So I Was Like Oh That's Just The Dream To Go To It's Called The Skank School The Founder's Name Was Last Is Skank So That's Where They Got The The Funny Name Yeah So I Wasn't Even On My Radar I I I Applied To

[00:23:23] who did her training at Skank. And she said, apply her there. She said, she will get in. She said, I did my training there and she will get in. I'll apply there. She's not going to get in. And then I think it was about January of that year. She was still in second grade. I got a phone call that Olivia had gotten into Skank. And I called my husband and my parents

[00:23:49] and her tutor. And we were just, I felt like it's going to be okay now. It's going to be okay. And they just, they told us at Skank too, like, you don't have to read to her all summer. It's not just like, keep reading to them more. Keep her, you know, they said, just let her be a kid. We don't want you to be the enemy. We don't you to fight the battle, be her mom, let her be a kid. And when she gets here, we're going to get to work. And it just, you know, they empowered her. They've taught her that it's her superpower.

[00:24:20] They've given her heroes. Everyone needs a hero. And, you know, she, now she knows about the famous inventors, the famous artists, and she has, you know, hopes and dreams. And because I think she's learned that dyslexia is actually a good thing. Once you can stop just saying, read all the time, read all the time, like read all the time, then you can kind of shift and,

[00:24:42] and you can say, well, what's my special superpower that only my special brain can use? And I think, I think she's really, she's in that phase now. I'm grinding. Oh, baby. Happy tears. Love you too. You're going to have to edit us out. Girlie.

[00:25:13] Girlie. No, you know, here's the truth is that this is, this is the gift that in 30 years, Olivia, you're going to look back at this and listen to this recording and realize that life for you at your age is school, right? That's everything right now. It's an, and later in life, it's not everything.

[00:25:35] So right now you're, you know, thank God you are in a safe environment that is going to just build your self-esteem up so high and it's going to give you a foundation for the future. And that is something, it truly is the biggest gift. I want like all of our listeners to hear this because there's so many times that I hear parents talk about not wanting to move their child's school.

[00:26:03] Like, oh, it's a neighborhood school and I want them to be friends with the neighbors and, you know, have a normal upbringing. And there is nothing normal about walking into a traditional classroom as a dyslexic person. What's the first thing you see on the wall? Posters with writing. Guess who can't read it? All of us, right? And you're thinking of a kindergarten, first, second,

[00:26:29] third, fourth, fifth grader who's struggling with reading. And even just the environment in their classroom is designed for readers. So when you're, when that is not the way you take in information, it's already like having to join a club that you really don't feel included in because most, and I will say most teachers, not all the wonderful teachers that we've been mentioning, but,

[00:26:55] you know, most 90% of the classrooms are not designed for Olivia and myself, right? And so we have to go into these spaces and deal with the stress and just deal and that stress builds and builds and builds. If you don't make a move into a setting that understands the child as a whole,

[00:27:20] because as I'm hearing in this story is that it's not just the reading, writing, spelling, that will come, that will come. It's Olivia's whole demeanor, her self-esteem, her appreciation for life and her happiness because you're put into an environment where you're understood. That is why these specialized schools can be priceless and more powerful.

[00:27:48] Let me ask you a question, Olivia. Tell me the difference between a friend that has dyslexia and a friend that doesn't have dyslexia. What's the difference? The difference is for me... That's a good question because she has two best friends and one does have dyslexia and one doesn't. Yeah. So sorry to interrupt you, Olivia. Oh yeah. It's fine, mom. So with a person who has dyslexia, you can really communicate. If you're

[00:28:18] struggling, you can just, hey, you're struggling too. Let's do this. We're gonna, we're on the same boat. We'll do it together. But with a friend who doesn't have dyslexia and my friend who doesn't have dyslexia, I don't take this the wrong way. You are still very good friends. You can't exactly connect. It's like, hey, can you help me? And they're just going to try to teach you the way

[00:28:42] they're learning, but that's not always the right way. Sometimes that's going to overwhelm you. That's going to put you in a different mindset and then it's overboard all over again. Mm-hmm. Yep. And also something for you to think about. There's something when, like when I told you that I was dyslexic, what did you say to yourself in your head? I'm just curious

[00:29:08] if I'm thinking what you were thinking. I'm not alone. There's a community. I'm with this, like a tribe. I'm, we're standing together. We are not alone. Absolutely. And were you less afraid to make mistakes today on this recording? Yeah. This is like, now I can take this when I go to other schools, past skank, maybe even to college. Now it's like, I've found a group of people who are

[00:29:38] trying to help us, but slightly differently. We can relate. Yes. The relating, right? And I know when I meet another dyslexic child, I used to do educational therapy. And whenever I worked with a student who was dyslexic and we had to work on writing, I would sit with them and just be like, this is going to really suck, huh? And the kid would be like, yes. And I'm like, all right, we're just going to go through it together. Like this is going to, like, should we eat chocolate while we do it? Like, because we

[00:30:07] got to pair it with something that sounds a little bit more fun. So it's this understanding of, I get it. I know what it's like to be humiliated. I know what it's like to read ahead of everybody else because I think they're going to land on the fifth paragraph on the second page because I've counted how many people are in front of me. So I know which part I'm going to have to read out loud. I mean, even with my family, we do that at holidays and like, they're still like, Aaron, do you want to

[00:30:34] read? And I'm like, yes, yes. I'm going to read now because I want to practice. I want to keep practicing, but it still gives me a little panic. So, but that being said, it's the connection that I think is really important. Okay. So I do want to bring up some advice because I feel that you two have a lot of advice to give others. So I'm going to ask both of you the same question. What's the best

[00:31:02] advice you can give to another? And for Olivia, it will be another child. And for Chrissy, it'll be another parent just finding out, oh, I'm dyslexic. Like they just got the news. They were dyslexic. What advice do you do? Olivia, do you want to give to that little girl or boy? We're together. Okay.

[00:31:25] You're not the only person. Just ask a parent, ask teachers, ask them that you just need help. It's not embarrassing. It might be for you, but it's part of life. People struggle. You might have heartbreak, but you will succeed. Just keep trying. Keep trying. Don't give up. Okay. Wonderful. Chrissy, what would you tell a parent that they're just finding out?

[00:31:52] I would tell the parent, you know, really, you just did the hardest part. You found out. That's the hardest part is taking the steps and figuring out what's going on. So I think for the parent is just kind of get your plan in order. Find your people, find your community. I mean, there's Facebook groups. There's your podcast. That's how I found your podcast two years ago. It's just like

[00:32:17] looking for someone else, you know, even your voices to tell me I wasn't crazy, but find a friend. You know, I talked to my best friend whose daughter has autism and while they're different neurodivergencies, she had been through similar struggles. Like just find your calm and then get your plan in order. Then share it with your kid. I think with Olivia, when I told her she had dyslexia,

[00:32:43] I wanted to make sure she knew about all the remarkable men and women who have dyslexia so she could understand what it was. And she's a really good listener. So she was really easy to tell. And I think she was relieved too. I think she felt like, oh, okay, I'm not dumb. Cause I think she was trying to feel like she was dumb. Um, and I think, yeah, yeah. I think she felt a relief. She

[00:33:09] felt like, oh, that's what it is. Um, so I would say, you know, make telling your child a positive experience. And then after they know, I think it was important for Olivia to feel like she was part of the next steps. So I wanted to empower her to feel like she knew what was going on because if she, you know, just kind of heard the whisperings, then of course, then she is going to think something's

[00:33:37] wrong instead of feeling like I'm a part of this decision. This is what's going to happen. You know, we toured a few schools and she told me the ones she didn't like. And I said, okay, let's, you know, we won't go to that one. Um, so she felt like she had a say in her, in her decision, you know, and then just talking about it. Like we just talk about it. It's not a secret. It's like, you know, I've, I have green eyes. Olivia has dyslexia. I think it's, you know,

[00:34:02] you'll get through it for the parents. Like you're not crazy. This is to all parents, but it does seem to lean on the shoulder of moms. And I think as women, a lot of times, you know, we already feel like the hysterical woman stereotype is weighing down on us. And so I think, you know, you just trust your gut and just, it's going to work out. It will work out because

[00:34:26] it just has to, you know? Okay. Olivia, last question. Okay. Now that you're in a school specifically for you, what does your inner voice say about you and who you are as a person and as a learner? I am unique. This is like a one in a million things. One out of 10. I used to think

[00:34:51] it's me against the world. I'm just stupid. I'm dumb. I can't learn. Now my inner voice has changed now that I'm at skank. It's changed from I'm dumb to I'm special. I am one in a million. This was a gift. It's not a burden. Sometimes it might feel like a burden, but it's a gift. It will

[00:35:16] help me later on in life. Just be a kid right now and have fun with it. 100%. She's really kind of been an advocate to some younger kids. My younger daughter was in pre-K last year. You know, so a lot of the parents knew Olivia went to skank and I actually had two parents kind of pull me aside and say, do you think, just what do you think about skank? What do you, you know?

[00:35:44] And Olivia talked to their kids and, you know, kind of championed them and said, you know, dyslexic. That's a good thing. You're going to love this school and good for you. And she's really been an encouragement to other kids too. So I'm really proud of her. Yeah. I see that you're going to be like an actress or something. Well, thank you guys so much, Olivia. We can't wait to see what your life is like in a couple of

[00:36:11] years as you finish out school and figure out what art school you're going to. Thank you. Thank you for sharing today. Yeah. You guys have been wonderful. And I think say so much sage advice for so many parents. And also Olivia, you sharing is going to make a huge difference for another 10 year old girl or another eight year old or 14 year old girl to hear the story. So thank you for being

[00:36:40] brave enough to come and share today. Today's episode is sponsored by Advocate to Educate. We help parents navigate through the confusing maze of special education in public schools in California. We support families starting as early as preschool through 12th grade, creating individual education plans to support the specific needs of your unique and amazing child. To learn more, go to our website, advocate to educate.com.

[00:37:11] Today's episode is sponsored by Dyslexia On Demand. Dyslexia On Demand uses only the highest trained dyslexia therapists, and it's all one-on-one and individualized to your child's needs. The best part is that it doesn't matter where you're located because it's all virtual. Visit us at dyslexiaondemand.com to learn more. Thanks for spending time with us on Don't Call On Me.

[00:37:36] If today's stories touched you, please take a moment to follow us on social media and subscribe on YouTube. Extend the impact by sharing your story at don'tcallonme.com. Your experiences can foster understanding and strengthen our collective voice. Let's keep making a difference together. We look forward to having you back for the next episode.